Mia Donahue Sjoman and her family.Photo:Mia Donahue Sjoman
Mia Donahue Sjoman
A long journey to building a family has come with double the happy ending for one family.
“I had a large, cancerous mass behind my cervix, so I had to have a surgery called a radical trachelectomy. It’s basically like a half of a hysterectomy, in hopes of preserving some fertility,” she tells PEOPLE exclusively.
“We actually found out from some of the reproductive endocrinologists that due to the surgery, I was unable to get pregnant naturally. My only route would beIVF, which I wish that I had known earlier,” she shares. “Had we know, we would have started our journey earlier with IVF, but in March 2022 that’s what we did.”
“At that point, we had very few embryos left. I had gone through so much body trauma, even to do a transfer. There was a lot before getting to the point of trying to carry my own child,” she says.
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Mia and Pierre Sjoman.Mia Donahue Sjoman
Mia and Pierre took a month to do research and feel firm in their decision. But with an overwhelming amount to consider, it was hard.
“I just felt very lost in the process. So my husband and I decided to post on Instagram, sharing that we’re going to be moving to this option. We wanted to see if people had anyone that that would be open to speaking with us that have gone through the journey, who had been through it themselves.”
Sharing on social media wasn’t entirely new to Mia, who had previously opened up about her cancer journey online.
The pair were surprised with the outpouring of research and support they received when opening up aboutsurrogacy.
Once their minds were made up, “It was like the stars finally aligned for us,” Mia says.
Mia and Pierre Sjoman during IVF.Mia Donahue Sjoman
“We found two agencies that we liked, but we were strapped financially from IVF. Both the ones we liked were set up so that you didn’t have to pay until you match with a surrogate, so that gave us some more time and ultimately, we signed with both,” Mia shares. “In early June [2023], we had some calls with potential matches from agencies. Mid-month, we found one we thought were amazing, and I guess they felt that as well.”
The next steps involved medical preparation, sorting legal matters and further developing their relationship with their surrogate. In the meantime, Mia battled symptoms of what appeared to be a kidney infection.
“In late August, I experienced a lot of bleeding and major pain in my back. I’ve been hospitalized for a kidney infection before and thought it was just that. I told my husband I needed to go to the ER and get checked and get antibiotics,” she recalls. “I went and it turned out that it was not a kidney infection — I was actually two months pregnant.”
Mia was completely shocked, having previously been told she had “pretty much a 0% chance of ever getting pregnant naturally.”
Pierre and Mia Sjoman.Mia Donahue Sjoman
Mia’s pregnancy was progressing well enough, which left the couple to decide what to do about their in-progress surrogacy journey.
In her own pregnancy, Mia planned a C-section, knowing that she couldn’t begin to have contractions because of her surgery.
Mia announces pregnancy.Mia Donahue Sjoman
After a “late scare,” Mia welcomed daughter Lane in March at 36 weeks.
“She was tiny and I was recovering from the C-section while also keeping up with our surrogate and her midwife appointments. We’d watch over FaceTime, trying to see this tiny human grow and praying our son would continue to progress healthily,” she says.
When the surrogate’s pregnancy hit 32 weeks, the couple realized they were on the verge of having two infants at home.
The couple was on a hospital tour with their surrogate when her water broke unexpectedly.
“It was all extremely quick, like even within an hour of her water breaking. We went into the labor and delivery room and my husband was with my daughter and I was there helping out,” Mia shares.
Mia and Lane Sjoman.Mia Donahue Sjoman
“The midwife undid it and gave me him to hold, but he was blue and limp and not breathing. I started to panic because at that point, you’ve been through this whole journey and you’re a the end and it’s just like, ‘Oh my God, it’s not going to work out,’ " she remembers.
The NICU team was able to quickly aid Ronin, with the new family of four getting together for a picture moments later.
“I was crying because I was just so happy he was alive and fine,” Mia shares. “It was chaotic and stressful but as soon as he was able to breathe and I could hold him, it just felt amazing.“Along the journey, Mia and Pierre were careful with what they shared and when about the two pregnancies. “We only told our immediate families, so just a very small group. I had a few close friends who have been there for every step of my journey that I shared with.”
Ronin and Lane Sjoman.Mia Donahue Sjoman
That made it all the more special when they got to share news of Lane’s and Ronin’s births as they happened.
“It was a huge weight off my shoulders and so exciting. With my daughter, I was so excited to be pregnant but so stressed at the same time,” Mia says. “I wasn’t able to share all the milestones you see everyone else doing, which was difficult, too. You want to share your excitement with everyone. But we waited until our daughter was born in March to share that we welcomed her and that we were pregnant via surrogate.”
She adds, “Then being able to tell everyone we were home with both babies safe in our arms and that we’re now a family of four, it was the best gift we could have ever been given.”
“There are so many people going through this and if I hadn’t reached out, I wouldn’t have known it and wouldn’t have had the support that we got and the resources we were introduced to. If you’re comfortable, talk to other people and have those conversations while having as much of your own research that you can,” she says.
First photo of the Sjomans as a family of four.Mia Donahue Sjoman
“And be gentle with yourself,” she adds. “This time can be overwhelming and draining emotionally and physically, but also financially. Know you’re not alone and reach out to others to get the support you need.”
The new mom continues, “Every day still, we go, ‘Oh my God, we have two babies.’ It feels surreal. We feel so blessed and thankful because we could have never imagined how our story was going to play out, but now it feels like this is how it was meant to play out.”
source: people.com