Lily Allen and David Harbour Separate After 4 Years — The 'Marriage Has Been Crumbling': Source (Exclusive)

Mar. 15, 2025

Lily Allen and David Harbour attend the “Dreamland” Special Screening at Picturehouse Central on March 30, 2023.Photo:Karwai Tang/WireImage

Lily Allen and David Harbour attend the “Dreamland” Special Screening at Picturehouse Central on March 30, 2023 in London, England

Karwai Tang/WireImage

Lily AllenandDavid Harbourare calling it quits.

The “Smile” singer, 39, and theStranger Thingsactor, 49, have separated after four years of marriage, multiple sources confirm to PEOPLE.

“Her marriage has been crumbling,” an insider tells PEOPLE exclusively, “and they have split.”

Reps for Allen and Harbour did not immediately respond to PEOPLE’s request for comment.

Allen — whomarried Harbour in 2020after meeting on the celebrity dating app Raya — alluded to a recent “tough time” on the Dec. 16 episode of her BBC podcastMiss Me?with co-host Miquita Oliver.

Though Allen did not offer additional details as to the source of her trouble, she said it was affecting her mental health andcausing her problems with her eating.

Lily Allen and David Harbour attends the Premiere Of Universal Pictures' “Violent Night” on November 29, 2022 in Hollywood, California.Momodu Mansaray/WireImage

Lily Allen and David Harbour attends the Premiere Of Universal Pictures' “Violent Night” on November 29, 2022 in Hollywood, California.

Momodu Mansaray/WireImage

Earlier this year, Allen offered a glimpse at some of the more unconventional aspects of her marriage to Harbour, such as herOnlyFans account, on which she sells pictures of her feet, and the fact that theycontrolled each other’s phone apps.

“I now have a kids’ phone called Pinwheel. It has no browsing capability and no social media, but you can still have Uber and Spotify,” she toldThe Sunday Timesin May. “My husband is the caregiver on it, so he controls what I’m allowed to have as an app on my phone. I’m the controller of his as well.”

Then in July, she said on her podcast that Harbour thinks herOnlyFans account is “great.”

“At first, he was like, not turned on, but he was like, ‘Is this a kink for you?’ And I was like, ‘No, it’s totally not a kink,’ but maybe there’s something in the power element of it that’s slightly kinky for me,” she explained.

David Harbour and Lily Allen attend the 26th Annual Screen Actors’ Guild Awards on January 19, 2020 in Los Angeles, California.Amy Sussman/WireImage

David Harbour and Lily Allen attend the 26th Annual Screen Actors’ Guild Awards on January 19, 2020 in Los Angeles, California.

Amy Sussman/WireImage

Allen also revealed on her podcast in June that she sometimesrejects her husband in bed.

“I wonder if I kink-shame my husband,” she said. “Because he often quite asks for things, and I’m like, ‘No, babe, it’s not happening.’ ”

“I’m not like, ‘You piece of s—, how dare you ask me to do that!'” Allen joked. “I’m just like, ‘Hmm, headache. Little headache, got a bit of a headache — maybe not tonight.’ ”

In September 2023, Allenmarked their three-year wedding anniversarywith a sweet post on Instagram that she captioned, “3 years with this guy, 2nd best decision I ever made. 1st was that dress.”

Lily Allen and David Harbour during their Las Vegas Wedding.lilyallen/Instagram

Lily Allen and David Harbour 3rd wedding anniversary

lilyallen/Instagram

In November 2023, Harbour opened up to PEOPLE about finding his perfect match in Allen.

Allen and Harbourwere first linked in January 2019, when they attended the BAFTA Tea Party together, and later confirmed heir romance that October.

Over the years, the two spoke openly about their relationship. In an interview withThe Sunday Timesin October 2020, Allen shared how she was hopingto have kids with Harbour.

“I think so. Especially now Marnie’s getting so big,” she said.

In June 2021, Harbour opened up onJimmy Kimmel Live!, revealing that a conversation he had with Allen’s daughters while riding their bikesled him to get married to the singer.

“The little one was riding along and she was going like, ‘David, dad, David, dad.’ Because the D got her confused,” the actor recalled. “And the older one got very upset with that, which I understand. She was like, ‘He’s not our dad! He’s not our dad!'”

Lily Allen and David Harbour attend 2020 Netflix SAG After Party at Sunset Tower on January 19, 2020.Charley Gallay/Getty

Lily Allen and David Harbour attend 2020 Netflix SAG After Party at Sunset Tower on January 19, 2020 in Los Angeles, California

Charley Gallay/Getty

Harbour continued: “And then the younger one was like, ‘Well what is he? He’s kind of our dad.’ She’s like, ‘No he’s not, he’s our stepdad.’ And she goes, ‘What is he?’ And she goes, ‘He’s just some guy in our lives!'”

The actor confessed that the girls’ conversation motivated him to take the next step with their mother. “I was like, ‘I need to marry this woman,’ " Harbour joked. “Because the emotional fallout … "

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During an interview withBritish GQin July 2022, theStranger Thingsstar recalled the early days of their romance, noting how he knew something was different with Allen after their third date.

“I was in this phase where I was like, ‘I’m just going to be brutally honest about everything,’ because why lie? And I told her something about my life, about my beliefs,” he said. “It would take a really extraordinary person to be accepting of the things that I said.”

Lily Allen and David Harbour attend Netflix’s “Stranger Things” Season 4 Premiere at Netflix.Arturo Holmes/WireImage

Lily Allen and David Harbour attend Netflix’s “Stranger Things” Season 4 Premiere at Netflix

Arturo Holmes/WireImage

He added, “And I remember thinking:Wow, that’s somebody I want to be around.”

Prior to their split, the couple was often seen with the girls out and about. They attended theStranger Thingsseason 4 premiere, a screening of Marvel’sGuardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3, and most recentlyTaylor Swift’s Eras Tour.

Gillian Telling

source: people.com