Nate Berkus Lost His Photographer Boyfriend in 2004 Tsunami and Is Now Curating a Show of His Work (Exclusive)

Mar. 15, 2025

Nate Berkus.Photo:Ashley Burns Photography

Ashley Burns Photography

Nate Berkus' life changed forever on Dec. 26, 2004.

“This show was really hard for me to curate and really hard for me to be a part of, to be honest. It brought up so much, [but] I’m really grateful to Marcelo for asking me to pursue this,” Berkus tells PEOPLE exclusively in this week’s issue.

“Woven Together: Reflections” is on display at the Cristina Grajales Galleryin New York City through the end of January, but Berkus says that opening night was really the most impactful moment for him.

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For more on Nate Berkus’s account of the 2004 tsunami and other survivor stories, pick up this week’s issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday, orsubscribe.

The exhibition featured Bengoechea’s work as well as some of his possessions that Berkus had held onto over the years — everything from a table he owned to pottery he collected, and even little envelopes Bengoechea used to file all of his business cards and receipts from all his trips in so that, “if he wanted to know where he had the best dim sum in Shanghai, he could always get back to it,” says Berkus.

“Woven Together: Reflections” on display at the Cristina Grajales Gallery in New York City.christina grajales

christina grajales

“I knew that the best way I could honor him and everything that he stood for was to continue living my life. It would be a waste for me and such a dishonor of everything he stood for, for me to just stop moving, stop learning, stop seeing, stop accepting beauty, love, song, connection, creativity, all the things that bring us together as people,” says Berkus of how he was able to move forward.

Still, revisiting old wounds in such an intimate way wasn’t easy, and Berkus does wonder what Bengoechea might think of his legacy if he could see the gallery now.

“There’s many different sides to every situation like that. [Marcelo’s] primary focus is making sure that Fernando’s art continues. And I think that there’s obviously an enormous amount of beauty in that,” says Berkus. “I think if anyone carries more of the weight of his loss, it would be Marcelo, but I don’t know how Fernando would feel.”

On the website for “Woven Together: Reflections” is a message from Marcelo that reads in part: “I’ve come to accept my brother’s death, but I refuse to let his art die with him. It took me 15 years to reach that conclusion, and since then, I’ve been dedicated to keeping Fernando’s art alive.”

source: people.com