In the nearly five years since his ex-wifeNaya Rivera’sshocking 2020 drowning death,Ryan Dorseysays their sonJosey, now 9, has had a “sad but sweet” request for his dad.
“He’s been telling me for years that he wants a brother and a stepmom,” Dorsey, 41, tells PEOPLE inhis first sit-down since Rivera’s death. “I’m like, ‘Well, I got to get a girlfriend first.’ Expecting someone to sign up for my life and his life, it’s not easy. I think he’s easy, but all the variables, it’s a lot to ask from someone.”
The actor says he’s currently dating someone on the east coast several hours from where he lives in West Virginia — and while Josey has given his stamp of approval, he’s “cautious” to not move things along too fast.
“You bring somebody around and Josey gets hopeful, and you don’t want to break his heart,” he says. “But, to be honest, I think he can handle anything at this point given what he’s been through.”
Ryan Dorsey at Calamigos Guest Ranch in Malibu, Calif., on Feb. 3.Anais & Dax
Anais & Dax
Indeed, Josey was only 4 when hewatched his mom drownat 33 on July 8, 2020, while they were swimming off a rented pontoon boat in Lake Piru in Ventura County, Calif. Josey — who was found asleep and alone on the adrift pontoon later that day — stillholds a lot of guilt.
“Something he’s said over and over is that he was trying to find a life raft, and there was a rope, but there was a big spider on the rope, and he was too scared to throw it,” Dorsey says. “I keep reassuring him, ‘Buddy, that rope wasn’t going to be long enough.' That obviously still sticks out in his head because he feels like he could have saved her. I think she just got caught up in a brush — that or a weird undercurrent from the dam. It was just a freak occurrence."
Ryan Dorsey and son Josey at Calamigos Guest Ranch in Malibu, Calif., on Feb. 3.Anais & Dax
As Josey has gotten older and started to ask more questions about that day, Dorsey says he’s had to tell him, “Life is not fair. Bad things happen and there’s no reason for it, and you just have to do your best to be a good person.”
“It’s hard trying to explain things that you can’t really make sense of no matter what age you are,” he says. “I’m not a big believer in everything happens for a reason because I can’t ever think of a reason why he doesn’t have his mom.”
Naya Rivera and Josey Hollis attend the premiere of Warner Bros. Pictures' “The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part” at Regency Village Theatre on February 2, 2019 in Westwood, California.Gregg DeGuire/Getty
Gregg DeGuire/Getty
“The hard part about being a single parent is you don’t have that co-parent situation to help you make decisions, like what school he’s going to go to, which sports to play,” he says. “Grandma is his mom’s mom and grammy is my mom, and grandma and grammy have their input, but ultimately everything is up to me now, you know?”
Since Rivera’s death, “I haven’t had any girlfriends really,” Dorsey says. “Obviously, he’s a full-time job and career is a full-time job, and then you got to do things for yourself, so there’s not much time to go out and try to meet someone.”
He’s hopeful though about his current connection.
“It’s someone that keeps me ambitious and inspired and off the [dating] apps,” he says. “It’s been a long time since I met somebody that I’m like, ‘Let me try to give this a real shot.’ So, we’ll see what happens. I’m taking it one day at a time. I’m hopeful my single-dad days are numbered.”
Even if his relationship status changes, Dorsey says he’ll always remain focused on keeping Rivera’s memory alive.
“The one thing I’m trying to do in her honor is to always make sure I’m throwing a banger of a birthday party for Jojo because [his first four birthday parties] that she threw were all fantastic, well-planned, well-thought-out, themed parties,” he says. “I think I’ve done a decent job for a couple, but [we’re coming up on] 10. I’m going to throw a blowout. I hope to be able to make her proud being able to throw a party like she used to throw for him as he gets older.”
source: people.com